Looking at your own situation, how much of your life is formed by things that are outside of your control versus things that are within your control? Please elaborate to the extent you feel comfortable.
I will start from my childhood. My mom passed away when I was six. This made a huge impact on my life and personality. This was something that was out of my control.
My father, a very loving and kind man raised all three of us siblings. He taught me great life values and gave us a good upbringing. It was also a draw of luck to have such a wonderful person as my parent.
I was gifted with an almost photographic memory and a good brain. I studied towards becoming a doctor, putting in as much hard work as I was capable of/ willing to. This I could say was in my control.
I got married during the fourth year of my med school. It was an arranged marriage with my consent. I had planned to finish my degree but again fate intervened and instead of a doctor, I became a mom. This part of my life was although destined, it was happening with my will so I’ll take responsibility for it.
I have three lovely, gifted children. All are intelligent, hardworking and great human beings. They have worked hard to achieve success in their professional lives. But even here external circumstances have played a role in which direction their life is headed.
I feel that though my character is formed by how I was raised, the values I was taught, and what I personally decided to adopt as my basic principles, where I am today is just a part of it. The rest comes from the circumstances of life.
To cut it short, we all are born with an independent will. Whatever path we choose, which decisions we make, we carry the onus of all those. However, where our life takes us is mostly due to circumstances beyond our control.
A famous Urdu poet Mirza Ghalib has said it so well;
*We take a ride in this ship of life Seemingly in charge, but in reality, without power
(*Paraphrased)
So just like the image above, circumstances and decisions are stone piled on top of each other. What is important and is supported by our actions stays on the pile and others slide away.
At first, I thought it was only the dog making noise, but it was somethingmore.In the background of the constant barking, I can now discern the noise of the storm.
The way Rocky was barking, I felt he was on the edge. Perhaps the storm that was brewing was making him nervous. I got out of my cozy, warm bed and went to him in the living room. He was standing near the window and barking. I could hear a note of fear in his voice. I took a long look at the waves crashing on the rocks outside and I understood his anxiety.
This was no ordinary storm. It was building up and we may not be safe in our little cottage. I called my friend Jeff and asked him if I could crash at his place for the night. Jeff told me to come immediately as he thought that this was going to be a rough night.
I was glad next day that Rocky woke me up during the night. He in fact saved my life. My cottage was badly damaged by the storm and if we both were in there during the night, we may not have survived it.
Despite being temporarily homeless, I was very grateful to Rocky for saving my life.
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