I have been married for 35 years, today.
More than half of my life!
It’s been quite a ride, I went from a naive 23-year-old to a 58-year-old grandmother of three.
Married life means a lot of adjustments and compromises. If a person thinks that by getting married they are going to get their happily ever after, they are in for a disappointment.
Marriage is a lot of hard work and it takes years to establish a family. I am lucky that I found a wonderful man and it was not that difficult to make it work.
But two people, however similar they may be, are still two different personalities. And to find harmony and sameness within a relationship takes a lot of give and take.
My journey was not very easy but love, understanding, and a will to make it work, made things manageable. I am today so proud of my three children who all are doing well in their own lives. And of course my three lovely grandchildren too.
Here’s to many more years of happy married life!
The adventure continues 💖
Michael is the host of Tale Weaver.
Image – Gary Larson/Google images
What is happiness?
Have I found it?
If you think happiness is this elusive sentiment that you have to chase all your life and when finally you get hold of it, you’d have achieved the purpose of your life, you couldn’t be more wrong!
Happiness is what puts a smile on your face, however momentarily. It is what makes your heart soar, however short the flight may be. It can not be permanent state. It can not be a goal which you achieve and then be happy forever. Because life happens.
Happiness can be perfect in the hindsight. We can be completely and utterly happy somewhere in our past or we can dream of being so in an ideal and idyllic future, which always is just around the corner but never here!
The trick to find happiness in life is to look for it in moments. There will be in most cases, happy moments, seconds or minutes scattered like gleaming gems and pearl through out your day. But only if you keep your heart and mind open to them. It won’t be a heavy shower to soak you to the skin. It would be sprinkling which will invigorate you, body and soul if you pay enough attention to it.
If your aim in life is to achieve happiness, you will be chasing it like a unicorn chasing a rainbow. For ever in sight but never in hand.
So let go of the notion of finding the motherlode and find nuggets of this precious commodity all through your journey of life and you will see that you are leading a pretty happy life.
I wish you a happy life!
This week write about your thoughts on the notion of happiness.
Have you found it?
Is it as elusive as always?
Is it something where you enjoy the process knowing you may only get a fleeting sight of it?
Go where the prompt takes you and have fun.
How often it is that we are affected by something someone has said or done?
In doing so, we give the power over our emotional wellbeing to others.
It is neither the responsibility nor the burden to be carried by someone else. We and solely we are responsible for our emotional well-being and happiness.
It is a tall order; To be unaffected by the stuff going around us. We are vulnerable emotionally and psychologically by the vibes we get from others, specially those whose opinions matter to us. We are sub-consciously seeking emotional support and validation from our friends and family. And instead of support if we are given a dose of indifference or criticism we react by feeling discouraged and unhappy.
What we don’t consider in this situation are the following factors:
1. The other person is not aware of saying or doing anything untoward.
2. They may have troubles of their own which make them oblivious to the problems you are facing.
3. They may be meaning the words in a different sense than what you took them for.
4. Maybe they did mean what they said but overreaction on your part are just making matters worse.
These are tricky issues which originate when we build our hope and expectations around others. We need to build a wall around our feeling, so that we are not hurt by any or all the remarks uttered by others.
At the end of the day, if we are unhappy, we suffer. So take the reigns of your emotional well-being into your hands and understand firmly that it’s your own job to keep yourself happy and not of anyone else.
Please share your thoughts and feedback in the comments.