55 years without you


It’s been 55 years

55 years since you left us

No goodbyes no last hugs

You died without us being aware of the tragedy happening

We were too young to understand or grieve for your loss

Took me many many years to accept what fate had dealt us

No one talked about you when we were young

Perhaps they thought it would be too painful for us

I grew up without knowing the mother who birthed me

Forever imagining what sort of person you were

Life goes on, and people learn to live with loss

We did too but there is a big hole in the place

Where your love and memories should have resided

But I can say despite all that emptiness

I love you mother

Though it’s been 55 years

Since I saw you last


This week I chose this image for a reason. Today it’s been 55 years since my mom passed away. This poem is to express my feelings about her passing which have always been buried deep in my heart for there was never a time I openly grieved for her. It was always too late.

My mom at the age of 19




133 thoughts on “55 years without you

  1. Such a tragedy. She was so young. My father lost his mother when he was 12 and she 38. He always remembered many things about her and always said a porridge (payasa) she made from a variety of millet was the best. I believe people are alive as long as we remember them. Thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I am so sorry for your loss Sadje. Time doesn’t always heal, it just softens the edges. It’s 26 years since I lost my Dad, and Mum passed away in January 2018. It feels like yesterday and I was thinking of Mum when I sang The Lord’s My Shepherd while I watched the funeral of our Queen.


  3. She looks lovely, Sadje. It is never too late to grieve. That part of your heart will always feel empty but the more you talk about her, the sooner it will fill. Sending you hugs and lots of love. Unhe jannat naseeb ho, aapa. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sadje, words are difficult to know what to say. First, your mother was so beautiful. I can see you resemble her. Next, sorry that your family chose never to talk about your mom. Finally {{{{{HUGS}}}} for the missing part of her that is within you. I do hope you meet her spirit in the next realm one day and she is able to answer all of your questions.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. A deeply moving poem. My condolences, Sadje, even though it happened many years ago.

    Sometimes, certain things we lack in life make us more empathic towards others who lack them too, and try to be to such people certain figures we never had.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. May your mother’s memories be for blessings.

    I think I have mentioned before that we have your verse in common… so much unsaid.
    I’ve been without mine for over 60 years. But I keep her image on the wall and what few stories I know close to my heart.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Your words in this peom express your inner sentiments, Sadje. It’s a beautiful tribute to your mother. I can’t imagine the sense of loss for her. She was a stunning woman. The photo shpwcases her inner and outer loveliness. May your heart forever hold her memories.
    Isadora 😎

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Look at her, Sadje!

    She’s giving a full smile, wearing a nicely designed dress, and holding a beautiful flower in her hands…

    seems like she’s inviting people to talk to her exchanging love.

    For example, gossiping with friends, caring children, telling stories and taking guidance from the elders etc.

    We love our mothers. I talk to my “mummi” every evening on voice call.

    She’s with you, because she reflects in you.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. It’s difficult to live with loss. For children their parents death is so hard to accept. My father and grandmother murdered by one lady. 😢 so I know how feel when we loss our loved ones.

    Liked by 1 person

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