The most difficult decision I had to make!

This week Fandango asks a very profound question;

What has been the most difficult, hardest, or most painful decision you’ve ever had to make in your life?


I have often written about the hardships I’ve faced in my life; losing my mom at an early age, a step mom that I didn’t get along with, physical illnesses and then some family circumstances that were quite trying and testing.

But these things happened to me where I had no say in the matter. I didn’t had to make a decision in any of them.

I think the hardest decision I had to make was moving to Seattle with my elder daughter and grandson. My two younger children were still unmarried and I had to choose my elder daughter over them. It was hard in the sense that it created feelings of resentment in my other children which still lingers. My husband has always been very understanding and supportive of my decision but there is always sibling rivalry and that has affected my relationship with my younger children. And though they are now parents themself, there is a feeling I often get that they feel I have showed favoritism.

And the most painful decision I had to take, that caused literally lots of physical pain was going for knee replacements. I absolutely had no idea when I elected to have my right knee replaced at the age of 50. It was truly painful in the extreme for three days. On the fourth day, the pain level, magically reduced to manageable level. And despite this experience, three and a half years later I got my left knee replaced. The second time around, it wasn’t that bad because;

a) I knew what was coming

b) I asked for self injecting morphine drip which helped me manage my pain.

Other than these, I cannot recall that I had to decide something that carried hardships or pain for me. But then I have notoriously bad memory. Maybe I have blanked it out because it was that painful?

Written for FPQ # 153, hosted by Fandango



49 thoughts on “The most difficult decision I had to make!

  1. I think the hardest decision I ever had to make was after my sister and her son’s father both died and I took in their 12-year-old son (my nephew). Then I had to decide whether to get outside help when he became violent towards me. That led to even more complications. It was a mess and one I still feel bad about, even though I don’t know how I could have done anything differently.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Sadje you have been through so much in your life and I am only just finding out things about you as I have only just begun reading your blog. I think you are such an amazingly resilient person. I can see how hard your decision would have been. Personally I have had so many hard decisions to make in my life but it would be hard to pinpoint one in particular but I may go to fandangos block and link up and answer his question in the best way that I can. I am using my old iPad here so hoping it will work for me and making this reply.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thanks Lorraine, I think we all have our own challenges to face, each difficult in their own way. I appreciate your kind words and am grateful to have friends like you. I think you should write a response to Fandango’s question because others can find courage from reading it. I admire you and your courage immensely.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for understanding. Yes, though painful at the time it was the best decision I took for my joints. When I see people suffering because they’ve left it too late I realize am thankful that I took my decision timely.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I am sorry about the loss of your mother. I also lost my mother at a very young age and didn’t get along with my first step-mother well at all, and my last step-mother (ex-step-mother) it’s touch and go.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I think the hardest decision for me has always been that, whether to keep trying in relationships or just let them go? ..but I admire your courage and the will to make that hard decision. May god bless you and your family

    Liked by 1 person

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