Fandango Provocative Question #24

“Have you ever been so afraid of failing at something that you decided not to try it at all? What’s one thing would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?”

I have and I did overcome that fear. That is the short answer.

Fear of failure is a most dominant factor in impeding our learning process. We are programmed as kids to succeed at everything we attempt. Failing is not considered an option. We have been taught that if we are unable to completely master something, we are not good or worthy and that has limited us in our learning capacity.

Today I read a post by Rory where addressed this very issue and that due to extremely negative attitude from his father he felt that he was not living up to the expectations of his family, he was made to feel very bad and worthless. We need to break this mindset. Give opportunities and make things easier for your kids but do not make them feel like a failure if they are not excelling at everything.

I was extremely lucky to have a father who not only encouraged me in every thing that I attempted in my life but also would stand by my decisions. One of those was that I refused to learn to drive when I came of the age. The reason was an un-rational fear of accidents. The reason was this that when a mere fourteen year old I was attempting to ride my brother’s bike and I rode into a wall. Nobody was hurt, just the bike got a bit dented but it left me with a fear of crashing. So as I said that my father stood by my decision and didn’t force me to learn driving.

What changed my mind later was the fact that you cannot survive in today’s world if you can’t drive. I learned later, when my kids were going to start school. But I still, after so many years get a few moments of panic when I sit in the driving seat. I would prefer to be driven but I did learn to drive! And drove my father around when he visited me!

One thing where if the fear of failure was removed, and I had enough spare money , would be to learn skydiving. Because failing here might mean instant death!

In response to;

Fandango Provocative Question #24



23 thoughts on “Fandango Provocative Question #24

  1. Love your transparency of sharing on this topic.

    Your bike story so resonates with me, it triggered my bike story at age 9 and fear of using the brakes, thinking they would fail and not knowing how to properly use them.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I don’t think, even if I knew I couldn’t fail, that I’d ever jump out of an airplane. After all, I might not fail at jumping from a plane, but I might fail at surviving the landing!

    Thanks for sharing this, Sadje.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. There is so much that I’ve been putting a pause on because of my fears! But not learning to drive is definitely one of them. For me, it’s because we constantly read about accidents and people over speeding and drunk driving that I can’t imagine myself and my near and dear ones with all those people and getting hurt. Also for this reason, when I was learning driving, I drove at a really slow speed and that itself is a potential cause for accidents. So do you see my fear here?🙈 it’s almost that I’ve convinced myself to never drive haha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I can imagine that holding you back. But I found out that it is an essential life skill. Otherwise you’re dependent on others or public transport, which is not available in many places.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Great post Sadje, skydiving is something that appeals to Suze, but it’s never rocked my boat at all, l live by the credo of why jump out of a perfectly good flying vehicle if you don’t have to and it’s not crashing?? 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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