Remember me when I am no more

We all are on a time lease. Our time on this earth is limited and is bound to come to an end sooner or later. Have you ever thought how your would like to be remembered after you are gone?

Thinking of dying, leaving this world or kicking the bucket, for some people, seems morbid. It maybe true that some of us are not going to think about it at all. While there are people who give too much thought to their end. I like to have a pragmatic approach. We all will die one day and there is nothing dramatic or extraordinary about it.

What legacy do I want to leave behind?

I have seen people inconsolable on the death of someone they dearly love. Than there are some who can’t wait for it all to be over, as the person who has passed away was no one’s favorite, rather they had been unpleasant to the extent that their passing away is seen as some sort of blessing.

I really don’t want that people to like or love me so much, to mourn my passing as an irrevocable loss, but at the same time I don’t want to be the person, whose departure as termed as good riddance.

There are two type of people who will be left behind to mourn ( or not to) a person’s death. One is the family. They have ties of love and attachment. Affection and family love, spanning over a long time is real. And the loss felt is real too. Then there are people who are distantly related, friends and family friends. These will be true judge of the character of the person who has left them. Why? Because it is not expected of them to love unconditionally and express emotions which they don’t feel. These would be the ones who will be the “Litmus Test” so to speak. So how does one lives a life, where we can pass the test of being a good person, whose life touched others in a positive manner and will be remembered well.

1. Be kind;

It is a kind person who leaves an everlasting impression on the mind of others.

2. Be generous;

Generous doesn’t mean spending or giving money to others, but to be generous-hearted as in accepting others as they are, being forgiving and most of all open-minded. And not to be mean-spirited.

3. Be a friend;

What does being a friend entails? Listening to the problems of others, offering solutions, consoling them after a loss and being there in hard times for them.

4. Don’t be a difficult person;

As we grow old, we become fixed in our ways, opinionated and hard to please. And old age brings a lot of pains and aches, even if we are in good health. The people who I have seen, getting along well with their care givers and family are those who maintain an attitude of ease. Taking things easy and treating others with an ease of manner. One has to take one’s own problems with a pinch of humor. This I think is the most difficult thing to accomplish. But I would try my best to be that sort of person who is not a burden on others but to be a blessing.


This is a bit different from my usual topics.

Let me know what you think of it. Waiting for your feedback and comments.


41 thoughts on “Remember me when I am no more

  1. I disagree with your statement of death not being dramatic or extraordinary. It is both. Death is the true Litmus test in my opinion. You are now free from the bounds of this earth and depending on your choice of master depends on whose hands you are now shaking. If your family knows your choices they should be glad and accepting that you got your final wish. Your list of 4 true test are excellent as they all reflect love.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I have wonderful writing friend Colleen, of “The Chatter Blog”, and a few lines she wrote a couple of years ago, sums up how I feel in my heart about where our memories lie
    Etched In Stone

    “When your father’s name is etched in stone
    It is never as indelible
    As the etching in your heart”ย  ย  ย  ย —ย  Colleen Faherty Brown

    Liked by 5 people

  3. Yes, treat others in a positive manner. As for “the afterlife,” I know people who have been planning for an afterlife all of their lives. I’m not one of them. If there’s something after, I guess I’ll find out then. I can’t even say I’d be surprised, because that might indicate anticipation. I do know how loss has affected me, so my only concern is for those who will miss me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. When I was young I remember the song by The Who called My Generation, in which one of the lines was “hope I die before I get old,” and being young and hip we enjoyed our youth especially as we were one of the first generations of young people to actually have a youth that was different from our parents. As time goes by and the generations pass, first grandparents, then parents one suddenly realises you are standing far too close to the front of the queue to meet the grim reaper.

    Liked by 1 person

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